When the story has fallen apart, there is not much that I can do, except trying to walk on, and move on. It’s not easy to try to erase almost a decade of memories off one’s mind. Every part of my life belongs to some part of the memories. And that’s the hardest thing.
When I read the papers at the coffee shop, I wished there was a time when I could draw random cartoons on his papers just like I always did. We always worked so hard so that at the end of the day we could go out, have fun and wind down. My imagination said ‘all right, read this, finish this, and then we could go watch Scream 4’. The reality is that there is no one out there to reach out for.
It’s just an empty space.
I am so sad I could almost give up.Though appearing all smiling and being strong, I still wake up and sleep with tears in my eyes. I really hope one day I will be able to look at the whole situation as a reason for my life to move on.
I keep telling myself, I will fight on because nobody can really help me but myself.
PS: I may have been too overwhelmed with sadness. But a short note re work, now I’m an ortho chief and I’ve been busy as hell! It’s good though, so I can remain focused.